


The West Princess

by msdownwithlove



Series: The West Princess [2]
Category: How to Train Your Dragon (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Arranged Marriage, Alternate Universe - Medieval, Angst and Drama, F/M, Friends to Lovers, Love/Hate, Part II of the Bird Set Free, Scars of the Past
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-12-21
Updated: 2020-07-26
Packaged: 2021-02-26 06:42:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 18,665
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21889108
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/msdownwithlove/pseuds/msdownwithlove
Summary: "She was born to be more than a princess from west. Her strength is unique and her heart is as beautiful as she is," prince Hiccup was told before he discovered her heart was the hardest one he had ever seen.
Relationships: Astrid Hofferson's Father/Astrid Hofferson's Mother, Heather/Snotlout Jorgenson, Hiccup Horrendous Haddock III/Astrid Hofferson, Hiccup Horrendous Haddock III/Heather
Series: The West Princess [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1552825
Comments: 25
Kudos: 51





	1. Shadows

“That was… unexpected,” the prince panted as he laid his head on the soft hay and closed his eyes, trying to catch his breath. His worn-out face was glistening with sweat as if he had run a few miles without stopping with his full armour on. The young man didn’t even notice when his partner rested her head on his stomach breathing as heavily as he did.

“I needed a distraction,” the princess gasped as she brushed a few wet locks off her forehead and licked her dry lips. She felt like she was in a bubble and its warmness, quietness and coziness were drawing her to fall asleep right there and with a man she hardly knew. She got her bliss and was determined to revel in it as usual.

“I kind of figured it out,” a quiet laugh reached her ears and her lips moved as well. She wished there were more moments of peace and freedom in her life, not just rare minutes she managed to steal from time to time. Most importantly, she wanted to enjoy them with all her heart, having no one behind her back and watching her take a false step. Sometimes she regretted she wasn’t a peasant’s daughter who could easily run away with a neighbours’ boy to live happily ever after because no one would care. However, she was a princess, not just by title and Hofferson name, she had royal strength and wisdom in her blood and she felt them running in her veins – that was something she couldn’t get rid of. Her upbringing, responsibilities she was taught to obey and duties to fulfill were keeping her put as well as her parents and their advisers. Nothing could ever change that: it was her curse to her dying day.

“Don’t you think we need, em, you know, to talk about it?” a question came and she felt his muscles tensed as he pulled himself on elbows.

“No,” the princess simply said. Of course, _this_ conversation was inevitable but they still had some time for that. After the morning she spent with her ladies and in a tight and incredibly heavy outfit they called a wedding dress she wanted to escape from reality more than ever. It was a blessing to forget their insincere praises and unnecessary pieces of advice in which they considered themselves proficient experts whereas she indeed knew more than these horny virgins. She was acquainted with this strong need to break the rule, to do exactly what she wasn’t supposed to and to enjoy that forbidden act feeling no guilt at all. “ _They don’t own me; I’m the mistress of my body and soul_ ”, she repeated each time she twisted them round, celebrating her little victory in somebody’s open arms. Life taught her not to care for others as they weren’t care for her. It was the only way she could survive in her golden cage and be herself.

However, the prince she was about to marry still had that stupid habit to think a lot about his actions and consequences they might cause. Actually, he was one of those poor people who had a tendency to overthink everything though reflection didn’t help; it always made things far worse than they really were. He needed to get rid of that naivety of his and if she wanted their so-to-called relationship work, she had to show him the beauty of being irresponsible from time to time.

“Not that I am complaining but you can’t just run into the stables, grab the first horse and ride it to its complete exhaustion!” Hiccup blurted out despite she made clear she didn’t want to talk about it now. The princess shifted her head just in time to meet his eyes and witness light blush appearing on his cheeks. He was on his way out of stables after a long ride on his horse when she caught him and yanked into the first free horse-box. She was too eager whereas he was too surprised to oppose, especially with her magical hands in _right_ places.

“Are you so worn-out?” she chortled and his sweet blush turned into deep red.

“Well, you are an experienced rider, so…”

He didn’t finish, afraid he had crossed the line and had said too much. Of course, she didn’t deny having different partners or made a big secret of it but any noble lady of her status would consider it insulting. Truth be told, she had heard far worse than that.

“I’ll take it as a compliment,” she gave him a reassuring smile and shifted getting comfortable on the hay with her head still on his stomach. At all events, she had no regrets and doubted she ever would.

Meanwhile, the prince couldn’t stop thinking about what his life turned into. Just a month ago he had a girl he loved by his side and lots of great plans for their future which now were no more than childish dreams. Instead of Heather he was engaged to the west princess he managed to screw twice before the wedding and with all pain he still felt he had no desire to do anything at all: make decisions, to be responsible and care for his people, to act as their heir.

Nevertheless, he couldn’t deny the fact that Lady Hofferson occupied his mind more often than she was supposed to these days. After that night they didn’t talk or show that something did happen between them; he had spent the rest of the night awake, ashamed of their intercourse, and had pondered the princess’ words over and over again. The mystery of her character was intriguing and he was grateful for her help yet he knew there was more behind her mask of indifference and he wanted to uncover those secrets. On the other hand, he had no right to ask for those yet; maybe, after their marriage and friendship they were eager to create they would trust each other enough to take a little of their secrets out. No matter how many times they would be intimate, a bond always starts with a conversation.

“How did you get rid of your ladies again?” the prince asked after a while, still lying in the same position and staring at the wooden roof of the stable. The day was at its zenith, he felt warm rays of the sun on his face through wee gaps between planks above.

Somehow, the princess found his question very amusing. She rolled over and placed her arms on his stomach with her chin on top of them. “I’ve sent them on a wild-goose chase to find the biggest peacock’s feather in Berk,” she explained, grinning. “I said it was our tradition to have one in our hair during a meeting with the King and the Queen of Dauntenerk.”

Hiccup frowned but when the realization hit him he burst into laughter. The west princess was a little dangerous vixen and he made a mental note not to play with her.

“Did they believe you?” he managed between laughs catching a glimpse of contentment on her face. At least, life with her would never be _boring_.

“I can be really persuasive,” she said with a smirk and he flushed again.

“No doubt of it.” After almost a month of neglecting, it was so weird to talk so openly or to laugh cuddling up against each other. He still loved Heather with everything he had but he had to admit that Lady Hofferson’s presence had made his life more bearable and lively. Almost free. He liked it and couldn’t afford to come back to drinking and crying over such an unfair destiny.

“Your parents will be surprised by such a luxurious welcome,” Hiccup stated and put his arms under his head, crossing them. The King and the Queen were expected to arrive today before dinner so that was the first reason he sneaked out the castle and rode Toothless as far as he could get. He wasn’t nervous to meet his new in-laws but the fuss around them was driving him crazy; even his own father considered it necessary to instruct him to behave well and not to talk too much. He certainly meant Hiccup’s feelings for Lady Jorgenson, unaware of what had already happened behind his back _twice_.

“They won’t.” The ice in her reply made him frown; the prince suspected her having a strained relationship with her parents but not at such terrible scale. He felt how her body tensed as the warm bubble popped as well as their lovely chat.

They were the ones to break her heart by killing her love, he guessed. She said it had happened two years ago but the wound was still aching, refusing to heal. Of all people Hiccup knew that the first love wasn’t something to forget that easily but what he didn’t know was how to mourn your beloved one drowning in the ocean of guilt. The shadow of that man was always behind her, following her every step, haunting her dreams and turning them into the worst nightmares.

“Oh, no happy reunion, I see,” the prince murmured as she suddenly shifted into sitting position and turned her face away from his view.

“I’d better go.”

This time he knew he crossed the invisible line of the princess’ past; she lifted her skirts ready to leave but he caught her hand, “Please, stay.”

By some miracle she obliged and laid her head on his stomach once again. He didn’t know why he asked her to stay; probably, it was a gesture of kindness to show some support like she did a week ago.

“Poor girls,” he tried to change the subject and distract her from sorrows. “It’s very hard to find a peacock in here, especially in autumn.”

“They deserve it,” the princess pointed, her voice still cold and lifeless, “I’ve been their doll to dress and play the whole morning and now I’m glad to return a favour.”

The prince said nothing; on the one hand, he couldn’t blame her for her anger as he didn’t like to be a marionette in someone’s hands either, on the other hand, how did it serve her now? She was alone among strangers yet wasn’t afraid to show them her teeth.

“Your Heather was with them,” she suddenly added and held her breath waiting for his reaction. “Asked what flowers I would like to have in my bouquet.”

“ _She’s not mine_.”

“I told her I didn’t care. Though Lady Jorgenson looks happy, she still cares for you. She was staring at me as if I was a fool.”

Hiccup shifted into sitting position and her head slipped on the hay. He was trying so hard to let Heather go and this conversation wasn’t helping at all. It was easier to think she had forgotten him or that she had fallen in love with his cousin. The prince knew Snotlout was fond of her and he wouldn’t waste a chance to prove his feelings. Hiccup prayed he would succeed. More than that he hated the princess talking about it; if her plan was to check on his broken heart, she could see it still bleeding. He knew it would never stop.

“I guess, she was right,” Lady Hofferson chuckled and sat as well; her fingers touched his hair as she pulled out a few straws. Sometimes men were too silly to see the obvious or too simple to catch up with women’s brain; as she expected he guessed it was a test but he was completely oblivious what she was checking exactly…

“I think we should go. Somebody will be looking for us soon,” the prince suggested and stood up holding out his hand. The princess viewed him, squinted, a ghost of a smirk on her sweet lips; he was certainly attractive, she had to admit. Even now as he stood under sun’s rays, she understood why his Heather fell for him: he wasn’t one of her ordinary men she used to spent time with. The prince carried himself just perfect in public, always polite and attentive though there was a passionate lover inside him, able to pleasure a woman like not every man could. Lady Hofferson still remembered the accident in her bedroom as one of her best one-night stands and while the princess couldn’t deny her body to experience it again, she also discovered how naïve and sensitive the prince was. In her current condition it was more than enough, so she took his hand and he lifted her on her feet.

“Let’s take care of your horse first,” she nodded to the horse-box where Toothless was with his saddle still on.

“Right,” the prince agreed and walked to his black friend. Green eyes studied his rider, not approving the way he had abandoned him earlier; he sniffed as Hiccup reached to unsaddle him.

“Yeah, I’m sorry, bud, for leaving you like that.”

He patted his forehead and then rubbed under his chin, earning his forgiveness; this horse was his only friend around here, the one he trusted with his life. Toothless purred and pressed his muzzle against his cheek making the prince laugh.

“It won’t happen again,” Hiccup promised and started to unsaddle him. When he finished, he was surprised to find the west princess standing near Toothless and gliding her hand down his neck with her mind somewhere far away.

“Are you familiar with horses?” he asked watching her quickly jump away.

“I was,” she admitted, avoiding looking at him, and he sensed another secret behind it.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“No.”

They were half way back to the castle when the loud horn reached them informing of the arrival of the important guests. The prince and princess stopped and looked at each other, reading the same in their eyes: this meeting would be the first test they need to pass. She squeezed his hand as a reminder and hurried forward to the castle: he waited a few minutes before he followed remembering the princess’ instructions from a week ago. From now he would hide everything. 

* * *

The Prince changed from his riding costume into official one just in time when somebody knocked at his door. He checked his reflection in the mirror, finding his black outfit looking good as usual even with his hated white neckerchief. The only thing in mess was his hair; after a long ride against the wind it was impossible to brush it and put on one side as his father wanted him to do for important events. No doubt, he would scold him for that later but the prince liked it be that way. He went out his room where the King’s secretary was waiting for him.

“His Majesty will meet you downstairs,” he declared as they walked to the Main Hall, “the Princess and her ladies are already left for docks.”

“Good,” Hiccup nodded.

The King in his finest green outfit was indeed waiting for him, the golden crown and fur cap behind his back made him even more majestic and invincible. The prince knew he would never be able to outshine him, no matter what he would do; there was no way he could ever look like that.

“What happened to your hair?” Stoick the Vast asked instead of greeting and Hiccup was really close to roll his eyes.

“Wind,” he shrugged his shoulders and then noticed how his father raised his eyebrows demanding an explanation, “I was in the woods with Toothless.”

“And your ride couldn’t wait one more day?” the King sighed though he already knew the answer.

“No, it couldn’t. I’ve already missed the whole week of trainings. You don’t want me to lose the next race, do you?”

“I don’t,” he admitted and moved to the carriage. His son wasn’t a warrior type as Stoick was but his stubbornness didn’t allow him to give up on his boy that early. As soon as the prince could properly walk, the trainings began. He was taught how to hold all weapons they had in store as well as how to use them. Obviously, he wasn’t good at it due to his slender figure and never dared to participate in any kind of fighting tournaments but Stoick was glad he also instructed Hiccup’s teachers to include horse-riding. It was a real joy to see him on his beloved Toothless as they were running across a field as if they were one. The prince wasn’t simply good at it, he was the best. He and Toothless had won every race five years in a row and the King wanted to keep it that way.

The carriage moved slowly through the tiny streets of Berk and occasionally, Stoick looked out the window to wave his people who were excited to meet the King. His son was sitting quietly opposite him, paying no attention to the crowd outside. He thought Hiccup was simply nervous to meet the princess’ parents but the prince knew he did nothing to earn people’s applause and didn’t want to bask in his father’s glory.

The nearer they were to the docks, the noisier it was outside; Berkians couldn’t wait to meet such important guests. They welcomed the princess a month ago and seemed to love her as their future Queen; now, when that Heather wasn’t in his way, the King hoped his son would take a closer look at the princess by spending some time with her and her parents. This union would guarantee not only the peace and stability for Berkians but also hope for some new beginnings.

The carriage stopped and a porter opened the door; Hiccup let his father to go out first, then quickly followed him as the King walked to the small group of Ladies waiting near the Dauntenerk’s ship. The prince couldn’t resist but glance at them; he snorted as his eyes found a dozen of peacock’s feathers in ladies’ hair and hurried to disguise it in a cough. His gaze wondered from one lady to another until he found the princess in her yellow-red dress from Heather’s wedding; her hairdo was the same as in the afternoon except for red roses in it. Her face expressed nothing as she fixed her gaze at the ship’s ladder wishing to deal with everything as soon as possible. Hiccup’s gaze fell on the lady beside her and his heart stopped. She was as beautiful as the last time he saw her a week ago; raven hair in a thick plait with a feather in it and slim figure wrapped in grey silk. She didn’t change as he expected but there was something in her green eyes that seemed different. A hand entwined around her waist and she turned her head to gift her husband with a smile. It wasn’t that painful to see how affection grew stronger between them, it simply filled his broken heart with even more sadness.

The King stopped before the west princess whereas she smiled at him and made a curtsy.

“Big day, my dear, isn’t it? To be reunited with your parents after a month apart?” he asked and his voice sounded so fatherly.

“Indeed, Your Majesty,” she sang; there was no cold in it as Hiccup witnessed earlier today. Was Lady Hofferson such a good liar? No, of course, she was not. She was showing them what they wanted to see: her smile, her politeness, her joy to meet her parents though she felt nothing of it now. Suddenly, the princess looked at him and made another curtsy: “My Lord.”

His surprise was genuine as he greeted her as well: “Milady.”

Stoick’s lips turned into smile as he saw those two at least speak to each other. He began to think that he was right about the west princess; she _would own_ his son’s heart eventually. He was sure of it.

The horn roared as all attention was focused on the ladder where the Queen and the King appeared. Hiccup had never seen them before but colours, expressions and mannerisms seemed very familiar. He heard how the princess’ ladies gasped as they finally set their eyes on the Queen who was walking down the ladder. She was blonde as her daughter and the echoes of her beauty were still visible despite her age. The red dress she wore was astonishing as the golden embroidered roses on it; the ruby earrings and necklace were shining in the sun likewise her crown, set on the top of her too complicated hairdo. She moved slowly, the finest silk rustling behind her feet, allowing everyone to see that rumours about west beauty were true. Like any royal member she was looking strictly straight whereas almost everyone was staring at her, bewitched and speechless, except for the King himself who followed his wife with a wide smile on his round face. He was shorter than Stoick but as big and muscular as the Berkian King was; they both were warriors, leaders not just in birth but in appearance though some grey were already visible in their hair and beards.

As they reached the ground, the page announced:

“Please, welcome Anton the Unconquerable and Catherine, the King and the Queen of Dauntenerk!”

People bowed as they walked through them right to the spot where their daughter and future in-laws were waiting for them. Hiccup himself couldn’t take his eyes of royals, impressed by the power they supplied; it wasn’t an arranged marriage, the prince was sure of it as the bond between them was visible and very strong. Though no enemies could ever conquer Dauntenerk and its King, Catherine was the only one to take both of them down with her love.

“Stoick, my old friend, it’s a great pleasure to meet you again!” the princess’ father said as he stopped right in front of his ally. “It has been almost twenty years since we beat the Outcasts!”

“Aye,” the King nodded and placed his large hand on another’s King shoulder. “And look where we are now!”

They shifted their gaze at the prince and princess who were on Stoick’s right; Anton’s eyes quickly scanned Hiccup before settled on his daughter. The young woman said nothing, only forced smile appeared on her lips as she made a curtsy. The King of Dauntenerk reached his hands to her and she accepted though there was no joy in her blue eyes as it was in her father’s. The princess allowed him and her mother to kiss her and then took her place beside her betrothal, drawing her parents’ attention to Hiccup again.

“Indeed,” Anton said as he viewed the young people as a couple for the first time. It was a pleasant picture to look at: this tall, slender and handsome man was undoubtedly well-bred, educated and grounded hence he would certainly be the one to make his Astrid happy and to teach her love again. She would be safe here with him.

“It was our luckiest day when we received your letter and gifts, Stoick,” Anton continued shifting his gaze to the King of Berk who chuckled and smiled at him. He spoke with a wide grin, relieved that one of the biggest and pressing problems seemed to be solved soon. “Our Astrid is everything we have and we trust you both to keep our treasure safe and sound.”

“You are prince Hiccup Horrendous the Third, I believe,” the Queen pointed and gave him once over; under her intent look Hiccup felt like he was five again. He didn’t remember his own mother thus he never spoke with a woman whose status was higher than his. Moreover, the Queen’s beauty was making him even more nervous, constantly distracting and mixing his thoughts as Hiccup tried to put them into polite reply. For a moment their eyes met and he was astonished how clear blue and familiar they were. Perhaps, the princess’ were the same colour, he couldn’t remember.

“I am, Your Majesty,” the prince nodded politely, voice hoarse but certain.

Catherine smiled softly and glanced at Stoick: “Your son has your eyes and a heart of a King though he’s definitely taken after dear Valka. Still he has something to look at.”

Hiccup felt his cheeks became pink whereas the Queen turned to her daughter.

“Hasn’t he, my dear Astrid?” she asked raising her eyebrows and by the look of the princess’ face Hiccup guessed it wasn’t a joke or something, it was a test. Lady Hofferson stared back at her mother, accepting the challenge with no fear of loss. It was a women’s game those rules were too complicated and unclear for men but, no doubt, related to the princess’ past and her lost love. One way or another, she had no intensions to give up on it yet.

“I find his way of thinking more appealing than his appearance,” was her response, quite and simple. The princess looked at him and smiled charmingly as if they were best friends. This time Hiccup noticed that her eyes were indeed blue like her mother’s.

“You seemed to get along,” the Queen stated and turned to her husband whose hand wrapped around her waist drawing her closer to him as a sign of support.

“Yes, mother, we found out we have something in common.”

“Really? What is that?” her father wondered, shifting his gaze from his daughter to the prince and back to her again.

“Horses,” she smiled and added: “ _The prince is a really good rider_.”

Actually, it was true but the double context of lady Hofferson’s remark made his cheeks flush and Hiccup hoped they would take it as a sign of shyness. It was the first meeting and he was already embarrassed; he feared they would guess what kind of horse he was riding this afternoon.

All at once, his father roared with laughter and hit him in his left shoulder.

“The pride of Berk! You should see him in a race – that is something!”

“That’s because I have the best horse,” the prince murmured avoiding looking at the princess, afraid of losing himself and slip up. It wasn’t that easy as he thought – to hide everything.

“Pity that Astrid doesn’t ride a horse anymore,” Anton sighed, glancing at his daughter who preferred to ignore that. “She could give you a real challenge, prince Hiccup.”

Well, that was a surprise. He knew she was familiar with horses and that there was a story behind it but by the way she inhaled sharply he understood it wasn’t a happy one and why she didn’t want to talk about it. His father, however, knew nothing, so he asked without a second thought:

“Why don’t you ride a horse?”

“Because I don’t have my horse with me anymore: Serena died and I didn’t want to take another.”

That tone, a creeping cold of her voice that was getting under his skin with goose bumps, was, no doubt, the first sign of stepping over the line of her past. However, no muscle was moved on her face, familiar mask of indifference covered whatever she had under it.

“Well, you are starting a new life now, darling, it’s time to forget the past,” Anton comforted his only daughter with another smile and turned to Stoick, “especially with your big day in less than a week! I can’t wait to see your new home!”

The King of Berk laughed quietly and raised his hand, inviting him to his carriage, “This way then, my old friend.”

So they went together, talking and remembering adventures from their youth; the prince walked a few steps behind them listening to stories his father never told him. Part of him knew it wasn’t due to their lack of communication; his father still missed his mother deeply and didn’t want to hurt both of them by bringing back happy moments, yet another part was disparate to hear at least one of them. The prince was a toddler when his mother died, so he had no memories of her despite rare flashes of his imagination: an unknown laugh or soft touch of somebody’s hands. Any stories from the past helped him to make a portrait of Queen Valka in his father’s cabinet to look alive.

Meanwhile, Queen Catherine and her daughter were following prince Hiccup and the Kings and were having a rather interesting and intimate conversation.

“You _slept_ with him!” the Queen hissed in her ear, yanking her hand and observing the prince’s back a few foots ahead of them. “Astrid, what were you thinking?”

The princess sniggered, covering her mouth, what made her mother even more furious; of course, she figured of her little intrigue, Astrid would have been disappointed if she didn’t.

“I was testing the waters!” she chucked, looking straight at her eyes. It wasn’t proper as it wasn’t right her mother’s eyes were saying but a tight grip on her hand was also screaming it was way too dangerous.

“What if he tells King Stoick?”

The princess freed her hand; this marriage deal was more than just a union of two allied kingdoms, so her parents were afraid that something would go wrong. She heard enough that it was for her and her safety but she wasn’t a fool. She knew no marriage could save her, only her plan could and it had worked perfectly so far.

“He won’t.”

Queen Catherine raised one of her eyebrows and asked with a smirk:

“Oh, have you already charmed this poor boy?”

Lady Hofferson glanced at the prince ahead of her and shook her head; she wouldn’t be able to charm him even if she was a goddess neither wouldn’t she ever want to do that.

“No,” Astrid finally answered, “like I said: it appeared we had something in common.”

“Horses, huh?”

In a way it was true but what they really both had behind their backs were _shadows_ ; the ghost of her stolen love and an idealized picture of his Heather. She doubted they would ever escape them, so she nodded:

“Yes, mother, horses.”


	2. The union

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi there! This chapter took more time than I'd anticipated and turned out a little bit different than I'd planned it to be. However, it's finally here and I hope you like it! Enjoy!

Today wasn’t for the faint of heart because some men in the prince’s shoes would have already fallen apart under pressure and high expectations he had been bravely carrying on his shoulders for the last week. He wasn’t blind or deaf either; he saw people looking at him - simple peasants and the noblest Lords - heard their muffled whispers, ridiculous predictions they kept making along with bold bets running here and there. The prince was their future King, _their_ humble servant and that left nothing he could keep to himself, they _were allowed_ to talk about him, imagine and discuss everything he was up to, from his royal duties to his private life. A life that wasn’t for a man with a pure heart because it had nothing to do with love, honesty or respect. It was a wicked game of politics and power where only wicked ones could survive. 

Though Hiccup had every right to be a little nervous as the groom or frustrated with the constant attention to his persona, he was absolutely calm and too confident for a person marrying someone he never loved, someone he hardly knew. The wedding was supposed to worsen his pain and the consummation was meant as a proof to show that he was completely broken now. However, the prince was fine. He had already survived the worst.

The ceremony was arranged at midday; the prince could hear loud noises from lower halls, servants who were running back and forth in corridors, neighing of horses and rambling of carriages coming to the castle - usual stuff for a royal wedding. Invitations had been sent to all kingdoms, to all rich and influential families and allies and everyone had promised to come.

In fact, King Stoick hadn’t stinted for his only son’s wedding day as he wished it to be the one people would remember for a long time. The merchants had sailed from west and east, bringing the best fish and meat, exotic fruit and vegetables for the feast. Even Berkians had been involved in preparations as they had collected flowers to decorate the Great Hall as well as the rest of the castle, strong man had been hired to build more tables and benches for the reception, the forge had worked twenty four hours to get everything done in time, needlewomen had been tirelessly making new tablecloths and napkins. Along with that great opportunity to earn some extra money, they had been happy to help their King, happy to witness the marriage of his son and thrilled to have a new Queen.

Hiccup had spent a lot of time with Lady Hofferson this week but nothing scandalous had happened as they always had been accompanied by her parents or his father. Hiccup had given them a tour around the castle since his new in-laws had taken interest in its history and traditions. They had visited the gallery in the North Wing where there were portraits of all previous kings of Berk, from Hamish I to his Grandfather. Truth be told, Hiccup liked being here, looking at his ancestors and remembering stories his father used to tell him. The prince didn’t expect that he would also enjoy sharing those great stories with anybody; Hoffersons had spent at least three hours there listening to Hiccup and adventures of finding a treasure and building Berk from scratch with its help. Anton had seemed to like the prince even more; their conversations had been lively as they had found a common ground in war history. Catherine’s gaze had turned from curious one to objectifying and Hiccup still didn’t know if that was for the best or worst.

The princess had been silent most of the time, speaking only when she had been asked a question. She hadn’t been eating much either; to Hiccup’s knowledge she wasn’t the type to sit around and starve. He had started to suspect that her fears and nightmares had returned along with her parents, filling the void in her heart with nothing but darkness and pain. They needed to talk; she needed to share whatever had been torturing her these days with him because she had asked him to be a friend. Hiccup had been looking for such opportunity but it had never come. His last hope had been a tour around Berk, on which both Kings had insisted. Stoick the Vast had found a day he hadn’t been too busy with council meeting or wedding arrangements and two families had agreed to go after lunch. Taking a carriage hadn’t been an option to travel around Berk, so Hiccup had known they would ride horses. His plan had been simple: while his father would be telling about sights, it wouldn’t be suspicious for the prince and princess to become detached from them and talk. However, Lady Hofferson hadn’t made it to the stables; Queen Catherine had excused on her behalf, saying something about a sudden headache. By her face it had been obvious that she hadn’t believed it a bit and so had Hiccup. He had even considered excusing himself from a ride but that would have been too much. So he missed the last chance of a proper talk.

Time had run too fast and here he was, in his bedroom, five hours away from the grand event. The prince got out of his bed, walked to the large window with a view on the courtyard and looked outside. Nothing seemed different; some kitchen assistants were unloading carts with fresh fruit, meat, fish and vegetables like they did every day while others were cleaning the yard itself. Loud screams of royal cook reached Hiccups’s ears and he laughed though he really pitied those poor kitchen-maids downstairs. 

It was almost the end of September but the weather was still warm and sunny what, undoubtedly, was strange for the North. The prince wished he could simply sneak out the castle as usual and ride Toothless deep in the woods to enjoy the wind in his face and the rustling of yellow, orange and red leaves under his horse’s hooves. The fresh air filled with the smell of mushrooms and needles of conifer was something Hiccup couldn’t get enough; he could just run, scream and whistle at his leisure and no one would see or hear him, no problems or important decisions were in his head. He loved that illusion of freedom the forests always held.

A sudden knock interrupted his dreams and he stepped away from the window, ready to face whatever that day had for him.

A page in his best uniform quietly entered the room and seemed to be relieved to find his prince there. The boy made a quick curtsy and Hiccup nodded absently as he wondered if his father really thought so low of him assuming that he could flee before _his own_ wedding. However, the thought about him dreaming about a ride with Toothless less than one minute ago made his lips curl into a small smile. Perhaps, his dad knew him _too_ well.

Something fell with a loud _boom_ outside and both young people turned to the open window right away where somebody was cursing at a broken basket, not skimping on all bad words he knew in all languages he could speak. The prince chuckled, shaking his head, and his smile grew wider.

The page cleaned his throat to remind the prince of his presence and straightened his back when green eyes were focused on him.

“His Majesty waits for Your Highness to join him for breakfast in his dining-room,” he announced.

“Alright,” the prince slightly shrugged his shoulders, lifted his hand to brush his long fingers though auburn mess. “How much time have I got?”

“Twenty minutes at the latest.”

“Tell him I will be there.”

The page raised his eyebrows but nodded and left with another curtsy; Stoick didn’t ask Hiccup to join, it was a direct order as usual however his son never missed an opportunity to remind his father that he could simply ask.

The prince shed his nightshirt as he walked to the wash-hand-basin on a dresser in the corner, poured some water from a jug and took a piece of soap. Hiccup was studying the reflection of a young man in a small mirror as he was covering his hands and face with soap. He was still growing; though his jaw was more defined and stubble started to become apparent, he still had some childish feathers like freckles all over his cheeks, a wide gap between his fore teeth or dorkiness that was hidden in the crook of his smile or caught in a glimpse of green eyes. That wasn’t a reflection of a King of Berk. Hiccup did learn a lot, did see a lot, did fall in love and did break his heart among the way but only proved that he was strong enough to take more. So, maybe, he would.

The prince took a blade and started carefully shaving his stubble as a peculiar thought dawned on him: no one had ever called or considered him being a child. All his sentient life he had been treated like the prince, the heir to the throne and a king-to-be; Hiccup had been forced to grow up much quicker than other children because while they had been playing with toy soldiers, horses and swords, Hiccup had real ones to prepare him for a time when he would take over Stoick. Indeed, the young man who was looking at his reflection in the mirror was just eighteen but deep inside he felt much older and in some cases wiser.

When Hiccup’s face was clean and hair didn’t stick out in all directions, the prince put a white shirt and black breeches on along with black boots and sleeveless jacket he wore yesterday. He would have to change in his wedding outfits soon, so he doubted someone would care that his clothes didn’t look fresh. Hiccup took his neckerchief and left his rooms; the prince walked to his father’s dining room quite lazily as his long fingers were trying to tie the neckerchief he so hated wearing. The young man wasn’t a fool to think that it was simple family breakfast to celebrate the end of his manhood; he was called for further instructions most likely.

Another page opened the doors to let him in where King Stoick was already waiting for him; his father’s green eyes lit up seeing a tall and slender figure of his son walking in.

“Here comes the groom!” Stoick exclaimed cheerfully and pointed to the place on his right side of the table. “Come and sit here, son!”

The prince obeyed, still silent and cautious; his eyes skipped through a bowl with warm porridge, fruit and a glass of wine and settled on his father, waiting. The King gestured to him to keep going, so Hiccup took his spoon and started to eat. They had been eating in silence for a few minutes before his father suddenly asked: “How are you doing?”

“I’m fine.” Hiccup slightly shrugged his shoulders. “I think.”

Stoick took a sip from his glass though the prince could feel how his eyes were scanning him and looking for any hints of lie. The young man inhaled deeply as he jerked his head fretfully.

“I’m _not_ going to run away!” Hiccup blurted out and met his gaze. “And I’m definitely _not_ going to do anything stupid if that’s what troubles you.”

His father chuckled, not surprised at all, and toasted to his son before he took another sip.

“Just wanted to be sure.”

The prince didn’t respond as he focused his attention on his tasteless porridge. Hiccup knew his role, knew what he had to do and how to act but to get a little bit of fatherly support would be nice. And then it hit him: it was a test, a quick check on how deep his wound was or how much control they had over him. He almost got into the same trap again. He remembered how cold and indifferent the princess was all the time and now he really understood why. Being a parent was a last-resort stuff for all kings and queens and as their children they should follow their example.

“As for the other part, I guess I need to enlighten you about the consummation…”

Hiccup choked on his porridge, heat burned on his cheeks as he realized the real purpose of having breakfast together: _the talk_.

“No need of that,” the prince managed, trying to get rid of a treacherous blush. “I’ve seen how to do it.”

He ordered himself to stay still, not to show how the images of Snotlout and Heather haunted him day and night, keeping his wound open and bleeding. On the other hand, he couldn’t tell his father he wasn’t that innocent as Stoick assumed. First of all, for the sake of Heather’s honour though they hadn’t been intimate, not like with Lady Hofferson anyway.

“It’s a big difference between to see and to know how to do it,” the King said seriously and Hiccup realized there was no escape for him. “And since there will be at least twenty witnesses, not counting me and King Anton, it has to be perfect!”

Hiccup really regretted those few spoons of porridge he had eaten because he started to feel sick the moment his father had said “ _perfect_ ”. He wasn’t afraid of having sex in front of witnesses nor pretending it was his first time; it was callousness he could not stand. He was supposed to think about it as another duty and to do it just to please others, to give them a show to remember, a thing to talk about and a proof of something he didn’t understand himself. They wanted him heartless but it was so hard to even pretend being such.

Hiccup gritted his teeth; he couldn’t win this game fighting everyone, the princess was right: he could fool them only by switching their places.

“So what do I have to do to make it perfect?” the prince asked calmly though his hands were clenched into fists under table and covered by white cotton tablecloths.

Stoick’s eyebrows slightly rose but then he smiled and tapped on his son’s shoulder exclaiming: “That’s the spirit!”

Hiccup’s lips were pressed in thin line; it had been one bullshit sentence and his father had already liked it! Pity, that Lady Hofferson didn’t mention how disgusting it was to play along. 

“Firstly, you have to enjoy the act, son!” Stoick continued; no signs of embarrassment or awkwardness were on his face like he was giving instructions for his first race with Toothless. “Listen to your body: it will guide you to the bliss you’ve never experienced before. Don’t be ashamed or afraid of your needs…”

The prince wanted to chuckle so badly; he knew how great it felt, how overwhelming and powerful the pleasure was but he also knew the rotten feeling after, the dirtiness on his skin or disgust enveloping his soul and making him feel like a barbaric savage. It was impossible not to be ashamed of having sex with someone you didn’t love yet impossible to fight the lust.

“But don’t lose your head completely as it’s not only your pleasure. The first time is quite painful for a woman, so you have to be patient and attentive. Caress, squeeze and kiss – it will help to distract from pain whereas slow thrusts make you both enjoy it.”

Of course, Stoick was right and his words weren’t useless, however, there was something missing along them, something really important. Hiccup noticed how his father’s face softened as old memories clouded his green eyes. 

_Love_.

The prince inhaled loudly whereas his heart began to beat faster. Love was hidden behind King’s words as he was speaking from experience. Hiccup never doubted that his parents loved each other – he was the result of that love.

And then he remembered: he was not allowed to love.

Nails were digging painfully in his palms as he unconsciously clenched his fists harder.

“Princess Astrid is very beautiful; it’s definitely an advantage for you. You should be aware that she might not come the first time and still it’s up to you to make her feel good at least…”

How could he? The prince didn’t understand how the person who married for love and had mourned that love for fifteen years could say such things. How could he betray his only son like that?

That wasn’t fair. 

How could he speak of such things without mentioning the most necessary part of it? Hiccup looked at Stoick who kept talking with that content smile on his face and listened to his briskly voice.

That was abominable.

“… summer will be a nice time to welcome a new heir…”

“What?” Hiccup asked hoarsely as if he didn’t understand what his father had said.

And he didn’t like that surprised look Stoick gave him.

“Your _heir_ , Hiccup,” he repeated, stressing the word the prince was terrified to hear again. “It’s almost the end of September, so the due must be in June at the latest.”

That was the moment when the fortress of calmness he had built around him was swept by another direct order.

“Right,” Hiccup nodded but it wasn’t right at all. They got him. Again.

The prince came to terms with his arranged marriage, with cold and not so innocent bride but he wasn’t ready nor wanted to beget a child; not now and especially not with a woman he didn’t love. He was sure the princess felt the same and since she admitted being intimate with random men for some time, she definitely knew how to prevent having an offspring. Hiccup heard women drink herbal tea or had special infusion for a bathtub and, truth be told, he didn’t care what it was as far as it was working.

Interesting that this matter concerned him more than the fact that Lady Hofferson wasn’t a virgin; somehow, he had no doubts that she wouldn’t have agreed to marry him if she hadn’t had a plan.

An hour later, Hiccup was pacing from one side of his bedroom to another; he just couldn’t stay still or sit as hundreds of thoughts occupied his mind, demanding some kind of order in there, clarity of his further actions. He hated when it was like that. The prince always kept his plans or some important tasks in his head along with small mental notes or steps to cover because it helped him to be well-organized and prepared for any troubles he might have in his way. It wasn’t even a habit or a whim, Hiccup needed that to get through the routine, not to forget anything or to come with the best solution. He planned all his meetings, lessons, rides with Toothless and more- that was the only way not to go crazy as he could never stop thinking.

His long fingers were working on the knots of his neckerchief while the prince was trying to come up with a new plan or a new direction at least. The previous one was simple: him and the princess would get married and would live their lives as they wanted. At best, they would have become friends, partners as the King and Queen of Berk. In fact, he did think about heirs but never considered it as a desperate necessity or expected the pressure on this subject from his father. However, he was sure in one thing – the West princess would never be the mother of his heir if he ever wanted to have one. Tricky knots finally succumbed to him and Hiccup groaned with relief as he pulled the hatred neckerchief off his neck.

He would marry Lady Hofferson – there wasn’t another option – but what would be next? His father wouldn’t stop demanding an heir and they could not shelve it forever. Of course, they could lie that the princess just couldn’t conceive but she would be the one Stoick would put his blame on. They needed another solution and they needed to think about it together. They still had time but it was running out too quickly and they had to be ready when it would be finally up.

By the time one of his trustworthy pages came to help the prince to get dressed for the ceremony, Hiccup had been sick of thinking. It was a nice distraction to stand still and listen to Tuffnut’s unstoppable gibberish while he was handing the prince the pieces of his wedding suit to put on. The young heir wondered why he couldn’t just wear one of his usual black suits – he wore one for his cousin’s wedding and really stood out from the guests, dressed in colourful and luxurious garments. He always thought it was the point of the whole event – to celebrate the union of two hearts, not to outshine them. And then he remembered the only thing that mattered was the union of two naked bodies before witnesses who couldn’t wait to get their hands on opportunities it would open.

Hiccup could tolerate white satin shirt and simple black breeches but a dark emerald checked waistcoat with a wide collar and a matching black tailcoat weren’t comfortable at all. Too many layers, he thought, which was definitely fitting the occasion. The worst part, of course, was the cravat tie. Tuffnut tried his best to tie it not too tight yet the prince hated it anyway. In his childhood servants used to tie a neckerchief like they wanted to throttled him and since then Hiccup couldn’t get rid of a feeling not being able to breathe freely.

“Behold, Your Highness,” Tuffnut said and pointed to the mirror in front of them. “Now you are ready to get married!”

The groom glanced at the reflection and found the same boy from the morning, a marionette in his father’s game of politics. 

There was a knock at his door and prince Hiccup chuckled, “So we shall get to the church then.”

* * *

“Why the long face?” Gobber, his father’s adviser and old friend, asked as soon as Hiccup got in the carriage. He and King Stoick were sitting in front of the prince in their finest outfits and couldn’t stop smiling widely. No doubt, they had been planning that day for so long and were thrilled to finally bring it to life. Hiccup knew he should look livelier and be excited to become a man in less than ten hours so he put a smile on his face and said:

“Your sight is failing you, Gobber!” The mask of fake amusement covered the prince’s irritation and sadness. Lies and sham came out easier with every new try; the line between being Hiccup and pretending someone he was not began slowly disappearing. “I’m just trying to be focused.”

“Coudnae wait for the night?” Lord Belch winked at him and both he and Stoick started to laugh so loudly that Hiccup feared the cheering crowd on the streets would hear them. That time the prince didn’t blush as irritation stole away all his shyness. 

“At least I don’t have to wear these pompous clothes in there,” Hiccup bit gesturing to his wedding suit; his long fingers snaked in a gap between his skin and the cravat tie and pulled it aside trying to catch a proper breath.

“No doubts you hae a lovely arse but I would rather take a look at that princess of yers,” Gobber managed through laugh and the prince could feel the gaze his father was piercing him with.

_An heir by the end of June._

Instead he turned his head to the window and started smiling and waving to the Berkians who were walking to the main square to celebrate the new royal union. He wished he could be one of them: knowing nothing of the wicked royal games and politics and worrying only about his harvest. If only that change was possible.

The only church in Berk was crowded like it hadn’t been for a long time. Hundreds and hundreds of guests were arriving and taking their places as it was almost midday. From his current position behind the back door the prince could see them greeting each other and talking; Hiccup didn’t even need to be near to overhear the topic – it was him and Lady Hofferson, the wedding and money which was spent on it.

Their gasps and gazes weren’t sincere as he walked down the aisle; they didn’t know him or what he felt but they were aware of him being the King of Berk one day, the status and wealth he had and would gain joining Hofferson House to the Haddocks. They were calculating advantages of him being a friend and disadvantages of rejecting the alliance. Hiccup didn’t blame nor hated them as once he would become the King, he would do the same.

The prince took his place in front of the priest, his father next to him as his best man, and turned his eyes to doors waiting for his bride. 

The princess was already here, her tiny slim figure appeared at the door along with King Anton and everybody’s attention was immediately focused on her as if she was a magnet. They started walking slowly down the aisle, princess’ back proudly straightened, and the prince could see that indifferent look not hidden under her long lacy bridal veil. Though it was an important tradition, the veil wasn’t put on like it was supposed to; it was adjust to a golden headband - which the princess was wearing- from behind. Her blond hair was braided in one thick plait; a few curly strands were left to frame her pretty yet pale face. There were no roses in her hairdo this time but they were embroidered with gold, red and orange threads all over her corset as the symbol of Hofferson House to represent their bravery, beauty and power. There was also one in her bouquet, surrounded by turfs of tall fresh grass mixed with cowberry and cranberry branches – plants that Hiccup loved – and then it hit him: it was Heather’s work. Only she knew how much the wild berries and tall grass meant to him and how many happy memories they held; moreover, green was the colour of _his_ House, the symbol of nature, peace and safety. Hiccup shifted his gaze to the crowd, searching for another pair of green eyes he adored no less. Heather was here, in the front row beside his cousin, smiling at him fondly, with love but on a different scale: there was no longing or admiration, just a gratitude for the past they shared and a hope for a new friendship. She was truly letting him go to take care of a new foreign flower in his garden, so thorny and fragile. The prince wished he could do the same in return. He behaved like a true gentleman, noble and reasonable, towards Lady Jorgenson, yet he knew _his heart_ wasn’t ready to let go. Oh, Thor, he loved Heather so much and would always do so but this love was forbidden, destined to be hidden from anybody. Except for his bride.

Hiccup couldn’t blame the princess for not smiling or for an indifferent expression on her face; she couldn’t play being in love or look at him dearly because Hiccup wasn’t a man who could bring the scattered pieces of who she was together again. He saw all kinds of shades of guilt she still felt towards her dead lover in her blue eyes, memories she couldn’t betray by giving the public a useless show. Hiccup wondered if the trail of her white satin dress was as shackles she would have to wear all her life or if the tight gold corset felt like hands squeezing her gentle throat and one wrong move would be her last. He knew that because they were in the same boat. 

When they made it to the aisle, Anton reached his daughter’s hand to Hiccup and slightly bowed his head as the prince took it. Green met blue and the groom was surprised to see his bride’s eyes were empty: no sass or smugness that she radiated two weeks ago at another wedding. Were his the same? Their hands were cold but the hold was tight as if they were seeking for comfort and strength to go through it.

They stood like old statues carved from marble before guests who couldn’t hear the loud beating of their hearts and agony of their souls that were screaming it wasn’t right.

“Dearly beloved,” the Priest started as everyone held his or her breath afraid to miss a word. “We are assembled here today to witness the union of two hearts and share their happiness of becoming a man and a wife…”

Though his words weren’t true in their case, they echoed in their heads as the last bits of freedom were slipping though their intertwined fingers no matter how tight they held them.

On the other hand, they weren’t children anymore; it would be stupid to display stubbornness or utter disobedience now and put their needs ahead of the others. Besides, would they be able to change anything? Both young royals knew the answer: yes, it would be easy to break the marriage deal, the alliance between their kingdoms but in the end, it would take ten times as long to make a mend and twenty times as long to put yourself back together.

“If either of you know any reason why they couldn’t lawfully join together in marriage, confess it now or stay silent forever…”

So they gritted their teeth withholding thousand reasons why they shouldn’t be married yet secretly hoping for someone to hear their prayers and save them from being locked in the golden cage from that day forward. Except for no one cared anyway.

The prince closed his eyes for a second as the silence became apparent.

“Hiccup Horrendous the Third, do you take this woman to be your lawfully wedded wife?”

“I do,” said the voice that wasn’t his yet those two words were sharper than any daggers as they left his tongue.

The princess sighed and squeezed his fingers as the Priest turned to her:

“Astrid Catherine Hofferson, do you take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband?”

“I do,” she almost whispered but her eyes were strangely dry as if she had already cried all her tears before they simply turned to dust. She wasn’t withholding her fear or sorrows; she was trying so hard to withstand the hurricane of anger that had been blowing in her heart until now. However, her heart was the hardest the prince had ever seen and somehow he knew it would sustain even that.

Again, Hiccup didn’t love her but couldn’t _not_ to admire her inflexible will.

They were asked to say their vows, to promise to support each other in sickness and in health, in happiness and in sorrow as long as they both shall live. An emerald ring that belonged to Queen Valka more than a decade ago sealed them as it found its place on the princess’ finger.

Their guests applauded as they were declared a man and a wife and Hiccup was allowed to kiss the bride. They were cheering so loudly that they didn’t notice how the bride slightly turned her head so the cold lips of her husband touched only the corner of her mouth.

Not that the prince wanted to kiss the princess, he was surprised at first before he remembered her words from two weeks ago. She didn’t kiss or was kissed on lips since her beloved had died. Since she had stopped believing in such thing as love and had banished every possibility to for it to come back to her.

The prince respected her choice but now it could cause unwanted questions, suspicions or even accusations. According to their vows, they were in the same boat, tied to each other, so if one fell, other would too. To prevent that, they needed rules.

* * *

The Great hall wasn’t just full; it was overcrowded which barely left any space for dancing – the main entertainment between toasts and toasts though the feast was impressive too. The number of chicken, mutton, beef and pork could only be beaten by the number of casks of wine, mead, brandy and whisky. That night wasn’t for the faint of heart or for those who could not hold their liquor. No one would sleep tonight drinking, eating, fighting and fucking at their leisure.

The groom’s glass was almost untouched as well as his plate; everything seemed tasteless for him just like in the morning. His wife was poking at her meat with her fork but her minds were far away from here. Their fathers, however, both seemed to conceive a liking for old whisky. Now, when the tie was knotted and all worries melted away, they didn’t restrict themselves in anything but wishes. Queen Catherine, in another breathtaking red dress, was sitting quietly beside them, smiling from time to time at kings uncontrollable dreaming about future. When their conversations switched on babies, Hiccup couldn’t bear it anymore.

“May I ask for a dance?”

The offer took the princess aback but she nodded and accepted the prince’s hand. Together, they made their way through the crowd to the center of the Great hall causing a loud wave of approval out their guests. To please the newlyweds, the musicians stopped playing a slow minuet and started a livelier polka. They bowed slightly and only then the prince’s hands embraced her waist and spoon her around. As they were moving, Hiccup saw out the corner of his eye that a lot of couples had joined them on the dance floor, Lord and Lady Jorgenson among them, beaming at each other in a tight embrace.

“These two are a thing, aren’t they?” the prince whispered to the princess’ ear as they stopped to change direction. His bride frowned not getting what he was talking about, so Hiccup shifted his gaze to the left and then back to the princess giving her a hint. Unfortunately, the partner change came and she disappeared from his view leaving him in one of her lady’s in waiting hands. That young girl was small as the princess but brunette with deep dark brown eyes; she smiled at the prince as her cheeks flushed. Then the princess was in his arms again and the melody sped up; Hiccup lifted her up to spoon around and switch places.

“I’m not going to lie, she is indeed fond of him,” she whispered as she leaned closer, her hands on his shoulders, and before the prince could blink she stepped back, blue eyes penetrating green. What was she expecting to see? Pain? Jealousy? Both?

He turned his head away and said:

“Good. I hoped she would.”

Of course, Hiccup was hurt and jealous but he was able to control his emotions. The prince wouldn’t let them play Heather card once again; if he was not allowed to love, he would grow a thick skin and would never love anyone again. Hiccup knew it would work. His wife stood in front of him as a living proof.

For the first time today the corners of her lips twitched up as she chuckled softly:

“Embracing change… I’m kind of proud of you, my Lord.”

“Thanks,” her husband murmured and if she hadn’t held his hands in hers, he would have definitely rubbed the back of his head like a little boy. They continued dancing as a thick ice wall seemed to begin to melt. There were a lot of things they needed to discuss but when the opportunity finally came, Hiccup didn’t know where to start.

“Are you alright?”

The princess looked at him, amused with his unexpected question, and giggled.

“Afar.”

“Excuse me?” Hiccup frowned and stumbled upon the princess’s long trail but managed to remain on his feet. His cheeks reddened quickly as the wave of embarrassment hit them. Way to go, Hiccup. He hoped nobody had seen that.

“You’ve started from afar,” she explained as they caught up with other dancers. “You are actually worrying about the consummation and everything that goes with it.”

Her straightness took him aback again but he was glad she brought that up: it was the matter of a great importance. In fact, dancing was a part of his plan not only to avoid the Kings and their wishes but also to finally to speak with Lady Hofferson, to see if they were on the same page.

“A little,” Hiccup admitted as they switched their positions again. “I assumed you had a plan.”

“I do,” she confessed without a smile. And then added with all seriousness: “You have nothing to worry about.”

It was the first wave their boat was going to hit and to stay aboard they needed to work together and to rely on each other’s ability to play the part. No doubts, there would be more waves to come but for now it was enough to simply have faith in each other.

“I trust you, m’lady, ” the prince distinctly said looking straight in her eyes. The princess stared at him searching for any hint of lie but found none. He really meant it.

“Thank you, my Lord.”

The music stopped and the guests applauded as the dancers bowed each other. Hiccup offered his wife a hand and led her back to their table. His father was watching them with a big smile; it wasn’t a saturated and content smile as he wasn’t happy for them - he celebrated another success of his plan! Suddenly, the prince felt a familiar burst of energy to disobey. He leaned to the princess’ ear and whispered:

“Just no heirs, deal?”

Lady Hofferson understood the situation without any further words; her gaze was drawn to King Stoick and her father but she wasn’t surprised to sense another condition on their marriage contract. Perhaps, she was expecting something like that as she smiled and stood on her toes to leave a quick peck on his right cheek.

“Deal.”

It gave Hiccup hope that luck was finally in their favour.

* * *

The wedding party was still going strong when the newlyweds were accompanied by their parents and other Lords to their chamber. The prince was glad to finally get rid of his wedding suit and to stand in his thin night gown in front of so many people was better than to spend another minute in it. He tried not to listen to the men’s speaking and turned a deaf ear to their pieces of advice whereas he was waiting for the princess to show up from a folding screen where Queen Catherine with some Ladies in waiting were helping her to undress.

Hiccup focused on his steady breathing; they had fucked before and today they simply had audience to look at them. Truth be told, it was a little bit arousing. His wife walked out the screen wearing a long cotton night gown that hid nothing in the candlelight. His father was right in one thing at least: her beauty was an advantage as Hiccup ogled her silhouette, curves of her tights and swollen peaks of her breasts moving up and down; it would be nice to feel more of her as her body had been mostly hidden under her wide dresses before. Her hair was put into a simple thick plait; her fingers were fiddling with the bouquet she still carried. Suddenly, it was too quiet in the room but the excitement everyone felt was too loud. The treacherous lust ran through the prince’s veins and settled in his throbbing cock.

The princess had clenched her fist around the bouquet before she reached it out to one of her ladies. She stepped closer to take it and the prince gasped as he recognized her. Heather made a curtsy as she accepted it and sent a comforting smile to both of them. Queen Catherine kissed her daughter’s cheek and ordered ladies to follow her with a simple gesture. Hiccup still didn’t like the way she was looking at him like he wasn’t worthy of her trust.

Meanwhile, the princess moved closer to him, a few inches separating their bodies, her blue eyes shining with a determination.

_Give them what they want to see._

And they did; Hiccup kissed her cheeks, her jaw as he moved down to her neck whereas her fingers ruffled his hair, pulled some strands when he found a sensitive spot near the swollenness of the breasts. She eagerly welcomed him between her legs clasping them on his lower back as they got comfortable in the middle of a big bed, not bothering to cover their bodies with a blanket. One of her hands moved to squeeze his right buttock whereas another reached beneath her back to pull the hem of her nightgown up.

_Show how strong and indifferent you are._

They were enjoying the act; their satisfied moans filled the room and heated the temperature around them. The couple didn’t care they were being watched and their almost naked bodies were exposed in front of witnesses and their fathers.

_Behave like you are free._

There was nothing they could keep to themselves anymore, only pain that was hidden well in the depth of their hearts and was waiting patiently for the right moment to emerge and strike back.

For now, all that mattered was a small blood strain on a white blanket and a nod of approval King Stoick gave his son as the witnesses had left their chamber, desperate to discuss the consummation with another glass of whisky.

Nobody noticed their lips remained unkissed that night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'd love to hear your thoughts!  
> Moreover, I will post a sketch I've made for this chapter on my tumblr at msdownwithlove, so feel free to check it out^_~


	3. Before and After - Part 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been a while... I’m not that depressed as I was in spring but I'm trying to find my way back to writing. This is the first part of the 3rd chapter. It's over 6K words as I 've managed to put only a half of planned events in.   
> Today I'll also post six sentences from the second part on my tumblr (@msdownwithlove).  
> Hope everyone is healthy and doing fine!

**Before and after**

**Part 1**

"O, my precious Hiccup, today is the day when my life was split up into before and after." 

Stoick the Vast said those words to his only son the day his wife had passed away. A five years old boy didn't understand what they meant at that time as he was woken up very early by his father who was sobbing uncontrollably holding the only part of his family that had left in his big shaking arms. The young prince had no idea of what had happened because all that mattered was the fact that his mother was gone and she would never come back to him again.

Many years later Hiccup was still missing her greatly but it was mostly the image from a portrait in his father's study and other people's memories he had been told since then. He spent a little time with her hence he couldn’t remember much to his disappointment. King Stoick, however, had never been the same since that night because the better part of him had gone with his wife. Lords and friends had been very supportive to both of them, saying that only time could heal; and it did but only to Hiccup. Meanwhile, for Stoick there couldn’t be anyone else after Valka.

The very first morning as not only the prince and heir to the throne of Berk but also a husband, Hiccup was lying in his bed with his sleeping wife and was wondering if yesterday was the day that had split up his life into before and after. Was taking his love and tying him to a stranger enough to break him? Was it really the beginning of his after?

He knew it wasn’t.

Except for the odd feeling of sharing his bed with someone, everything was the same.

He was the same.

"You haven’t slept," a quiet croaky voice reached his ears and he was immediately pulled back into reality, turning and meeting crystal blue eyes of his wife. She lay by his side, her long golden hair scattered over her pillow, the remnants of sleep still visible in the corners of her eyes.

"Not a wink," Hiccup admitted and gave her a reassuring smile saying it wasn't her fault but his restless mind.

"Never shared a bed, huh?" the princess chuckled as she rose herself on her elbow to have a better look at her husband. "I thought you weren't a virgin."

Clearly, it was a joke. She was teasing him in her own bewitching way but instead of laughing Hiccup felt the urge to clarify the discussing matter.

"I'm not - I wasn't a virgin the first time you and I..." the prince faltered out blushing. «Those women weren't the type I could invite to my bed."

"Courtesans?" the princess assumed, mere curiosity outshining her manners.

"No," he blurted out but she went on:

"Kitchen maids?"

"A few," Hiccup nodded without thinking and instantly regretted his words. When she was about to ask him again, he spoke first: "Can we stop right there, please?"

"As you wish, my Lord," the princess laughed enjoying how his red face cringed at her words. For somebody with quite eventful love life her husband was too bashful.

"I would be very grateful if you would call me Hiccup," he suddenly asked trying to change the delicate subject he wasn’t ready to discuss with anyone. It wasn’t something he was proud of. In fact, they still had more important matters to talk about.   
  
At first, his offer amazed her but then the signs of astonishment were wiped off by the flash of joy on her face. Though they made a pact more than two weeks ago, they didn’t really cross the line of decency. In conversations, of course.

"Only if you would call me Astrid,” the princess smiled. “We are partners after all."

"Deal."

After a lot of days of ignorance towards each other and diving into physiological aspect of a life as a couple, they finally made it to the point they should have started with. On the one hand, their newly formed bond was too fragile and unstable but, on the other hand, it just felt right for two broken hearts that were still lost in pain, as they could find some support and join their forces to get the day of their victory closer.

“So, Astrid, can we talk about another dragon in this room?” the prince nodded to a small dried blood stain on their blanket. A white lie to save the princess' reputation and a whopping lie to lock themselves in that golden cage, to be not only a man and a wife but also cell mates for the rest of their lives. Till then they would have plenty of time to confess their sins seeking for forgiveness and freedom but still finding none.

At least they wouldn’t be alone.

Astrid smiled as she lifted herself into sitting position and reached out her right hand revealing a tiny healing cut on her palm. It looked like she had pricked herself on something sharp; Hiccup took her hand in his gently though he doubted her wound would hurt.

“I guess I own a big thank you to Lady Jorgenson for adding a rose to my bouquet,” the princess said quietly, her eyes focused on their interwoven hands.

It was so easy yesterday, to clench her fist as hard as she could, feeling no pain or guilt; she was glad it wasn't her first time, the memory of which she had been cherishing every day since that happened. It had been as perfect as it could have been, it still meant the world to her, even after all those years of pain and suffering, of cold nights full of nightmares, loud screams and tears she had hidden in her pillow. Sharp thorns were nothing compared to them.

"Brilliant!" the prince breathed out in awe and froze realizing he had said it out loud. "I mean your plan, it's brilliant and simple at the same time."

Astrid chuckled as she fished her hand out of his. "Not bad yourself!"

"We make quiet a team, huh?" he smiled shyly and shifted into a sitting position to be on the same level with his wife. Then sudden seriousness stole sparks of enjoyment on his face. He cleared his throat before he said. "You and I perfectly know that last night was only a rehearsal of many others yet to come. We need to be ready."

His father’s voice echoed in his head, giving him more confidence to go ahead, to fight and give them nothing of his again.

"From this moment there won't be any lies or secrets between us... not counting our past, of course," he added seeing a disagreement in her eyes. He knew he could never ask for them as well as she couldn’t for his. "There are a lot of people against us now and we can't fool them alone without having a person we can trust and rely on. I want to try to be as free as it possible for us."

The princess studied him carefully; he imagined how her clever, yet wickedly pretty head was calculating a dozen possible consequences and weighing all pros and cons. Not that they had a choice now but he needed to ask.

"You are a nice guy, Hiccup Haddock," she finally said as sadness clouded the blue of her eyes. "Can you become a heartless creature as I am? Are you ready to spend your whole life without a real family? Not to love anyone and never be loved in return?"

The stubborn boy deep inside him would have said _yes_ immediately, giving up everything the reasonable part of him was still holding onto – a longing for love and family he had only seen as a wee lad. He was just eighteen years old boy whose heart was torn from inside out. How could he be sure that there was nobody for him after Heather? In five, ten, fifteen years? Hiccup knew he would overcome that loss eventually and would meet someone he would love again in coming years… And then the same sad story would repeat itself because he was the heir, the future king who was not allowed to love, only to obey and serve his people. The fear of having his heart broken over and over again was always stronger than some silly dreams of a happy family he might never have. No, he couldn’t risk it again. Hope was a dangerous thing for the royals like them.

"At least I will have a friend..." he gave a weak smile that Astrid returned as she shook his hand and said:

"Then I accept you offer."

An hour later, their morning was interrupted by a few servants who came to fetch their breakfast. They got dressed and left the safety of the Hiccup’s room to face whatever their new life had for them. They crossed the prince’s living room, guided by amazing smell of food, and entered his dining room with a big mahogany table right in the middle. It was strange for Hiccup to see it served for two as he had never had a company before.

“What is in there?” Astrid asked suddenly drawing his attention to the doors on the other side of the room. Doors that had been locked since he moved here.

“I’ve no idea” he murmured stepping closer to the entrance and seeing more servants as they were walking from one piece of furniture to another, tearing one white cloth after another and revealing a nice sofa with a preposterous tea table in front of it, a few old paintings and a bookshelf. This room was very similar to Hiccup’s living room and the realization finally hit him. There was another door on the opposite side, and he had no doubts what it was.

“I guess these are your new chambers,” the prince muttered. Of course, it was his father’s order, another silent but a very obvious hint to provide Berk with one more heir. Hiccup wouldn’t be surprised if Stoick would start locking them here to get what he wanted.

“Quite predictable, isn’t it?” the princess stated, not surprised as well. She was strangely calm while everything in Hiccup was boiling with frustration. He didn’t care for the rooms or for the princess permanent stay in them, on the contrary, he welcomed that but a small boy in him simply wanted his dad to talk to him first. Why did he never ask him?

“Let’s go to eat,” Astrid said and took his hand to walk him to the table as if she knew he needed a distraction not to do anything foolish like run away or smash something… Perhaps, he kept underestimating her because she knew what she was doing. Hiccup chuckled as he took his place at the table and it attracted the princess’ attention on the other side. She raised her perfect eyebrow in question.

“You know that I wouldn’t break anything or throw another bottle of wine to blow off some steam.”

“Glad to hear that,” she giggled remembering their conversation after Heather’s and Snotlout’s wedding. “I like these rooms better.”

It was Hiccup's turn to raise eyebrows as his mouth was busy with a toast; she took a sip of fresh orange juice before she answered:

“They will spy on me less, I suppose. Since I’m your wife and there is no way I can run away or cheat on you while we are literally living together now." Astrid bit her lips trying to suppress a chuckle but failed a few seconds later. "Naïve,” she burst out laughing.

The prince choked on his toast.

“Not that it’s my business but are you going to…?”

“No need of that anyway," she shrugged her shoulders, "I’m not a fool and I thought we both agreed to take advantage of everything we can.”

“Of course.”

He absently nodded while a warm wave ran down his spine and settled in his groin as a lustrous side of him welcomed a high opportunity of having sex with her again. Why would he not? She was beautiful, passionate, willing and of all women she was his wife.

"Another reason they will keep an eye on me," Astrid continued taking some grapes from a big plate with fruit, "is that they are afraid I will be persuaded to participate in a coup or that I may even organize one."

That simple yet dangerous word made him froze, all joy disappearing at once. Treason always went hand in hand with power, especially among royals, that like hunger drove them mad for something that could never satisfy it.

Hiccup put his spoon aside, staring at the woman opposite him and guessing whether she was joking again. And her impetuous nature and straightforwardness he started to like began scaring him as well. One way or another, she was still a stranger.

The princess looked at the prince, surprised by his silence, and her lips slightly parted as she realized her mistake.

"You know I would never do that," she said quietly, her eyes locked with his. "Or that I would ever want to."

She was right. He did know it deep inside his broken heart. That power took their loved ones away, it locked them together for good in a marriage faker than Gobber ' s artificial right hand and made them voiceless marionettes to succumb to the master's orders. They both loathed it and would gladly give it away for a chance to be whole and free again. Except, that wasn't possible anymore.

"Yes, I know," he nodded and she beamed at him with her most charming smile.

They spent the rest of the day in Hiccup’s bedroom letting servants to finish up with cleaning and moving Astrid’s possessions. They talked a lot. Though they deliberately avoided serious and delicate topics, they finally get to know each other sharing simple little things like favourite colour or food and funny stories from their childhood. Hiccup told her how he used to play in snow every winter and built his own ice castle where he imagined himself as a king imitating his father’s harsh voice and giving his ice people silly orders. The princess couldn’t stop laughing as her husband was unconsciously waving his hands in attempt to make the best impression. Though she had to dodge a few blows, she enjoyed it. She had never spent a lot of time with men since _him_ so she almost forgot what it was like to just talk to a man. On the one hand, it hurt so much but, on the other hand, it felt so good that she couldn’t resist. In return she told him how she was forbidden to leave her rooms without a guard who was always armed with an axe and small knives. As the only daughter of a king whose kingdom was attacked a few times in one year she had to submit to it but that didn’t stop the princess from escaping from her keepers to simply walk in a garden alone. The corners of her lips rose up slightly as memories of her scared and furious father glaring at her after she was caught recurred to her. If only…

Astrid bit her tongue cursing her inability to stop thinking of all what-ifs that might have happened in her life because she knew it was a dark labyrinth of her mind out of which she would never find a way out.

She startled as something warm touched her hand and then gently squeezed it.

“What is it?” Hiccup asked.

Of course, he noticed that something had suddenly disappointed her; his green eyes studied hers and she had no choice but to put her mask of indifference on again.

“Nothing.”

Astrid wasn’t sure her husband believed her though she was grateful he didn't insist. Of all princes who could have become her husband, Hiccup was a real gift from Gods and she didn't know what she did to deserve it. Or it was destiny that brought two scattered to pieces hearts together to give them a better chance to survive and turn their pain and anger into strength. Or it was just a coincidence or another lesson she needed to be taught. Later, when she wished Hiccup good night, went to her new rooms and settled in her new bed, the princess realized that whatever it was, that was definitely for the best.

Next morning, they met again at the dining table and had breakfast together. They managed to exchange a few phrases before they were interrupted by Hiccup’s page - Tuffnut- with a message from King Stoick.

"What does he want?" Astrid wondered as Tuffnut left with a curtsy and her husband broke the seal on the note.

Hiccup looked at it and frowned.

"Asks if we could join him at the stables after breakfast," the prince said still eyeing the message as if there was a secret meaning hidden between letters.

"For what?"

Hiccup shrugged his shoulders though the reason his father invited them at the stables worried him too. He knew the king wanted them to beget a child as soon as possible but how it would suit him?

"I don't know. He never rides a horse for pleasure. Only if he's going to war."

"Can we decline?" The princess asked with hope.

"I'm afraid we can't."

One part of Hiccup was glad to go out and see Toothless, maybe even take him for a quick ride. He had been married for two days and already missed the wind in his ears, the time he preferred to spend in the woods and the illusion of freedom it usually gave him. And now he needed to think not only about himself but about his wife too.

After breakfast they went to their bedrooms to dress up for a meeting with the King. Hiccup put on his riding suit because he still wanted to ride Toothless after whatever his father called them for. He was surprised to find Astrid in the same red dress she wore this morning when they met in the living room a few minutes later.

"Are you going to ride a horse in that?" Hiccup asked skeptically. "Where's your riding habit?"

The princess almost rolled her eyes as if her husband had said something stupid. She stepped to him and put a big red hat decorated with three roses on the top of her head, covering loose but no less complicated plait.

"First of all, I'm _not_ going to and second, I have _no_ riding habit," she pointed out her firm intentions and walked past him to the door which servants immediately opened for her. Hiccup followed her but this time he wasn’t going to let this topic pass.

"I know a fine modiste who will be honoured to make you one, so you can ride horses again," the prince suggested, pausing to see her reaction but Astrid just kept going. It made him frown. Whereas he truly understood her wish not to speak about her passed lover, a high cold wall she built every time he mentioned horses or races was beyond his comprehension. King Anton said she was a good rider and the prince noticed it that day in the stables: the way she was gliding her hand down Toothless’ neck and earning his trust with sad eyes that screamed she missed it so much. So why was she so afraid to move on and try again?

“Maybe a certain secret place in a forest no one knows about will change your mind,” Hiccup made another attempt, showing that he was no less stubborn than she was. “We could ride there together, stay there as long as we can and be ourselves. Be free.”

Astrid sharply drew in the air and slowed down; Hiccup’s heart skipped a beat in hope he finally found a hole in her high and thick wall. While her pining for horses wasn’t strong enough to break it, her longing for freedom was more powerful to shake it. The prince caught up with her but the wall was still here as her mask. At least, now he knew he was in the right direction.

They stepped into the main hall where servants were rushing around, busy with their morning chores but when the royal couple walked past them, people stopped for a moment to make a curtsy.

“Perhaps, I really need that modiste of yours to make me a new gown or two,” Astrid said quietly when they exited the castle and no one could hear them. Hiccup looked at her and smiled.

“I knew you would not resist!”

The princess frowned but then her eyes widened with realization.

“Gods, I wasn’t talking about riding habits or horses!” she exclaimed. “Haven’t you noticed the way people look at me?”

The prince considered her question for a moment and then said:

“They look at you as their future queen.”

However, Astrid shook her head and smiled sadly. The couple passed courtyard and headed to the stables across a small field.

“They look at _you_ as their future king,” she corrected him. “I’m just a princess from west, a stranger.” 

“But they like you!”

“They liked me while I was your bride,” Astrid corrected again. “Now I’m your wife so they look at me in a different way. They object the way I walk and speak, my manners and my wardrobe. You should know how people are quick to change their opinion.”

However, her reasoning made Hiccup chuckle.

“I didn’t know you care about what others would think and say.”

“As the princess of Dauntenerk I didn’t,” she admitted. “But as your wife and future queen of Berk I have to.”

Astrid sighed because she would always be a bird in his golden cage and could never fly away even if the doors would be opened wide. She would belong to Berk anyway. By her new name and with her body.

Hiccup was the prince; he would never know how it feels. And he didn’t need to. But she could tell him at least.

They walked in silence as Astrid tried to find right words to show him how lucky she was to marry him.

“You know that arrange marriages are a common thing everywhere,” she began and waited for Hiccup to nod before she continued. “There are kingdoms where foreign princesses had to change their names and to accept their way of life along with their traditions. Sometimes they are permitted to visit their homeland, write to their families and even speak their mother-tongue. To sum up, they must forget everything they were before.”

“Luckily, all I must do is to take your name and learn the way you, Berkians, live,” she added with a smile. “A small price to pay to be accepted by your people, isn’t it?”

“Indeed,’ the prince agreed. “So, you have decided to start with your wardrobe?”

“Good clothes open all doors.”

“Then I’ll ask my page to send a word to a modiste,” Hiccup promised smiling back.

“Thank you!”

“And you can always ask me about Berk’s traditions,” he added.

“I’ve already spent over a month here,” Astrid chuckled. “So, basics are learnt.”

The prince’s right eyebrow rose up in surprise.

“Really?”

“Well,” the princess drawled. “Berkians are not hotheaded as we, Dautenerks, but we share the same stubbornness. You are people of peace though always ready to fight if you must. You are hardworking and friendly, with knowledge what true love means.”

Hiccup’s lips moved up and as he turned his head, she was warmed by soft green in his eyes.

“Seems like we have more in common than stubbornness.”

The princess smiled though that feature was more bitter than sweet. Yet that was forbidden love that brought them together.

They were almost near the stables when they noticed the King and his men standing around a paddock. Hiccup frowned; he knew for sure that there weren’t any races these days and he was the one to train in the royal stables. Even if his father wanted to entertain the guests, it was too late for that: most of them were on their way home. Except for the princess’ family, of course, King Anton and Queen Catherine were going to leave next week at the latest.

Near his father, Hiccup noticed Lord Belch and his uncle and cousin – Spitelout and Snotlout Jorgenson; Astrid’s parents were here too. They must have had a very interesting conversation, so they didn’t see how newlyweds arrived. 

“Your Majesty,” both Hiccup and Astrid said and bowed to Stoick at first then to Anton and Catherine.

“Oh, you are here!” Stoick exclaimed. By the glimpses in his eyes and notes of excitement in his voice, Hiccup knew his dad was up to something. “Come here and look at this beauty!”

The prince and princes stepped closer to the paddock. Behind the men’s backs there was a white horse with long silver mane. It stood still looking at the audience with its big blue eyes as if it knew how to behave in front of royals. As if it was royal as well.

“I was assured that she is one of her kind: sturdy, incredibly clever and fast,” the King noted. “She survived a terrible storm on her way here.”

The prince reached his hand out and clicked his tongue twice as he always did with Toothless; the horse turned her attention to him and after a moment walked in his direction. No one dared to say anything until the prince’s hand touched her muzzle. 

“Ha!” the King laughed as Hiccup was gliding his hand up and down the horse’s neck.

“She’s indeed one of her kind,” he agreed and turned to Astrid. “What do you think?”

The princess was taken aback by his sudden question but couldn’t resist and reached her hand to touch the horse as well. As Astrid’s fingers touched white hair, the beautiful creature shifted its gaze to her. The princess was astonished by the intensity of blue in its eyes. Never in her life she had seen anything like this.

“She’s utterly gorgeous,” she murmured, unable to put her hand away. No doubt that horse was worth a few chests filled with diamonds and gold. However, she couldn’t imagine a fool that would exchange such precious and unique creature for that.

“She’s yours,” the King said loudly.

People gasped; the princess couldn’t believe his words. No, she couldn’t own that horse or any other. She just couldn’t.

“You are so generous, Your Majesty, but I…” she managed as the King smiled so warmly and put his hand on her shoulder.

“It’s my gift to you, my daughter-in-law,” he said softly as he put his other hand on Hiccup’s shoulder. “So now you can spend more time together and maybe one day you’ll beat the best Berk’s rider!”

It was a way too big gesture, Hiccup thought. He expected his father to simply locked them together to get what he wanted but Stoick decided to do it with the help of gifts and benevolence. The prince was sure that his wife guessed his father’s intentions but, unfortunately, she couldn’t refuse.

“Thank you, Your Majesty,” was all she could say. She managed to cast Hiccup a sad look before she was rounded by her parents and other lords accepting congratulations. The princess put a smile on her face and did what she had to.

The prince walked aside giving them space and was surprised to see his cousin joined him.

“How’s the prince’s life going?”

“Better than I had expected,” Hiccup said honestly. “Yours?”

Lord Snotlout smiled happily.

“Same.”

The prince pressed his lips together; there was a question he really wanted to ask but had no right to. He thought of something else to talk though Snotlout’s presence wasn’t helping at all. Instead, he could not help but notice some changes in his cousin: a proud look on his face, a joy that shone in his grey eyes and happiness he radiated like the sun.

“Heather’s doing fine, too,” Snotlout broke the tense silence answering the question the prince was afraid to ask. Hiccup sighed, not looking at his cousin. On the one hand, he felt gratitude for his cousin’s insight, on the other hand, it was overshadowed by jealousy and envy. Why did love torment ones and reward others?

“I want her to be happy,” Snotlout added. “Just like you.”

Hiccup swallowed a lump in his throat; he couldn’t get rid of memories of their wedding night that haunted him in nightmares. Gods, he truly wanted her to be happy equally as he wanted her to be with him. A wish that once was simply forbidden became impossible. And hearing her being happy with another man hurt no less than it did before.

“Glad to hear that,” the prince said instead.

“We’re leaving for the Jorgenson estate in a week or so,” his cousin continued. “We were absent for almost two months – firstly, my wedding, then yours – and there are a lot of things to attend to… Harvest has been reaped without us…”

“Tons of work are awaiting you as well as your new mistress of the house,” Hiccup finished for him and forced himself to smile.

“Indeed,” his cousin agreed, and his lips moved as well. “You have work, too, and new important responsibilities.”

“Yep,” the prince nodded trying to prevent him from dwelling upon them. “And speaking of them…”

He turned around to find his wife in the spotlight surrounding by the King, her parents and other Lords, answering their endless questions with a smile.

“Your Highness, how are you going to name her?”

“What do you think of her? Can she beat prince Hiccup’s horse?”

“When are you going to ride her?”

Their eyes met; though Astrid looked _happy_ , Hiccup could see it being one of masks. Of all people he knew how ‘ _happy’_ she was standing there and talking about horses. Her eyes widened as she noticed she got his attention. The princess tilted her head to the right, keeping her eyes glued on him as if she asked him to read her minds. Hiccup had no doubts Astrid wanted him to come and get her out of there. She knew she couldn’t run away on her own and no excise of her would make her look less ungrateful to the King and his generosity. She couldn’t risk losing his favour whereas Hiccup tried his patience since the day he was born. And he was happy to oblige.

“Excuse me, cousin,” the prince made haste to mutter, with a half bow, and returned to his wife’s side. She gifted him with a real smile and on the sudden impulse, he took her hand.

“I’m going to do a quick ride with Toothless to the place I told you this morning,” he said loud enough so everyone could hear. “Want to join me?

Still smiling warmly, she squeezed his fingers as a thank you.

“Maybe next time,” she answered. “I had to meet my ladies-in-waiting for tea. Truth be told, I’m already being late.”

“Then you should go,” Hiccup winked at her and let go off her hand. He looked at their small audience and added: “So, who wants to see the best rider of Berk?”

_______ 

Hiccup and Astrid both thought of time as a very strange thing. Sometimes, it run so slow that they wished and begged for it to go faster and when it did, always unexpectedly, it was too late and not necessary at all. Ironically, no one had control over such unpredictable thing and had no choice but to succumb to its peculiarities. Such powerful yet invisible thing had a lot of faces. Time was a wise teacher for those who were impatient and merciless for those who didn’t value it at all. Time was sympathetic and cured people’s souls whereas no one else could. Time was cruel and tortured those who didn’t know what love was. Time was both a keeper and a destroyer. And only time knew what the future held for all of them.

When life went easy, people didn’t notice its steps, too busy with chores or other things. Hiccup and Astrid accustomed to their new life together and to each other day by day. Their pain and pining were overshadowed by need to get used to changes and learn their new roles. Hiccup’s part was mostly mental as he needed to become less restless and more thoughtful. In other words, he simply needed to grow up. Whereas Astrid had to learn her way with her husband, his father, his people and the whole Berk.

Getting on with Hiccup was quite easy: they really had a lot in common and while he wasn’t talking about horses and races, the princess enjoyed their time together. He was the only one she could lower her guard with and be herself. With everyone else she had to be always careful with what she says, how she moves as she didn’t know whom she could consider a friend and who were her enemies. The princess had to be sure which role she must play with them.

In King Stoick’s presence she behaved like a true princess, obedient but not meek and quiet. The less reasons he had to misdoubt her, the better. After Hiccup, he was the last guarantee of her safety. She wasn’t Hofferson anymore; she was Haddock and had to behave like one.

Except from her main responsibility of bearing an heir, she was supposed to gain some power and authority along her ladies and be aware of all intrigues and love affairs. So, while her husband would be playing politics, she would be ‘swimming with snakes’. No matter how dull and boring it seemed to her, it was a dangerous but important game, so she had to be on the alert. Especially, when they knew ‘the waters’ much better than she did. Luckily, in return Astrid could feed them with whatever information she wanted. Like at the very first meeting when she told them about her wedding night and asked their advice for what dresses she should order, the princess knew she got into contact with them. However, it would take years to see whom she could trust and vice versa. Until then she would keep a weather eye on all of them.

As she would keep her eyes on other Lords since there were always traitors among even the closest people. Her wellbeing completely depended on Hiccup’s, so she’d better be extra careful. His uncle, Spitelout, was number one in her list just yet because he was the next in line if something would happen to Hiccup. Astrid knew that his great friendliness and endless support was only a mask as she was guilty of the same. Anyways, it was for the best that the Jorgensons decided to leave the castle for now.

Following their example, King Anton and Queen Catherine expressed a wish to sail back to Dauntenrek. Astrid was relieved to finally get rid of their overprotection and couldn’t wait to bid them a farewell. However, their decision seemed to upset King Stoick, so he announced races and great gathering in the castle on the day before his dear guests would leave.

Hiccup welcomed the idea and immediately told he was in. Astrid knew she missed the amount of time he used to spend with his horse, so another race excited him to no end. All week he tried to persuade her to start training her new horse, but she kept saying no, playing her ‘no riding habit’ card over and over again.

“From tomorrow this excuse won’t avail you,” the prince told her one evening and the next morning she received two boxes. One was big and contain two new dresses she ordered and in another, smaller one, she found a fancy green velvet riding habit with gold laces and buttons.

For a moment that beaty took her breath away but the next minute she stormed with the box to Hiccup’s living room and found him in an armchair reading a book.

“What is it?” she asked doing her best to contain her discontent. Her husband looked up at her and then at the box in her hands.

“Your new dress, I suppose,” Hiccup answered and returned to the book. Astrid inhaled deeply but pressed her lips together. Gods, she didn’t want to argue and not with Hiccup though he and his stubbornness asked for that. She sighed and said as calmly as she could.

“It’s a riding habit, Hiccup, and I didn’t order it!”

The prince put his book aside and ran his hand through his hair making it even messier. He looked at her and there were no regrets or embarrassment in his bright green eyes. On the contrary, Hiccup was challenging her.

“I did,” he confessed her assumptions and crossed his legs. “Consider it as a gift.”

Of course, he did. The princess presumed he wouldn’t give up, but she couldn’t understand why that bothered him so much. Why couldn’t he leave her alone as she asked of him and admit that she got on with horses in a distance.

“Well, pity it would never leave that box!” Astrid bit, turned on her heels and rushed to her rooms.

“Astrid!” Hiccup called and when she didn’t stop, he went after her. “What’s wrong with riding horses?”

The princess pretended she didn’t hear his question and kept going but prince’s legs were longer, so he caught her quickly. He held her by her upper arms; her back pressed to his front.

“My father asks me every day whether you like your new horse or not,” Hiccup said quietly. “And I’ve already run out of excuses. How can I keep protecting you if you don’t give me a reason to?”

Astrid bit her lips; after two years she still couldn’t nor wished to talk about her first horse. Those memories were precious yet so painful that she couldn’t bare a thought of living through them again.

“Let me be.”

However, his grip on her arms only tightened.

“Astrid, please.”

The princess screwed up her eyes before she whispered:

“Everything I loved had been taken from me. Tortured. Killed. Forgive me if I don’t want to risk my barely healed heart again.”

Astrid felt how Hiccup held his breath for a moment and his grip on her arms loosened a little. His fingers started running up and down her upper arms comforting her. It was so gentle and so sincere. She rested her head on his shoulder accepting his support as she rose her hands to catch his fingers.

“Don’t do this to me, Hiccup” she pleaded and opened her eyes. “Don’t give me hope.”

“I won’t, I promise. But can I ask you just to pay that horse a visit? I’ll come with you if you want. It breaks my heart to see how she suffers from loneliness.”

Astrid sniffed; she knew she shouldn’t give in but being in man’s arms and feeling his warmth melt her thick walls of ice. Gods, how she missed being taken care of. Missed being weak and trusting her life to a man.

“Only to visit,” she finally agreed.

“Shall we go now?” he asked, and she felt his lips moving up. Astrid turned around in his embrace to look at his kind and smiling face. Though she swore she would never love anyone again, she was still a woman whose husband possessed charms every woman should be very careful with.

“I’ll take my hat.”

**Author's Note:**

> As promised - Part II! I would be very happy to hear your thoughts!  
> Thanks for reading and there are more to come!


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